LinkedIn karma

Kicsit ciki volt már ez a gines poszt, így akar­tam írni vala­mit, hogy lej­jebb men­jen. Mond­juk nem tudom, hogy ez nem cikibb‑e, de leg­alább ezután nem hánytam.

Van nekem a Lin­ke­dI­nen majd­nem 1500 bará­tom, mond­juk ezek­nek egy részé­ről akkor se tud­nám elmon­da­ni, hogy hon­nan isme­rem, ha nagyon komo­lyan fenye­get­né­nek. Na jó, ez nem igaz, tudom, hogy hon­nan isme­rem az embe­rek jó részét: Lin­ke­dIn­ről, ami­kor írtak, hogy “let me be your Valen­tine con­nec­ti­on”. De nem min­den­ki­vel dol­goz­tam együtt, ez tény. Egyik ilyen ismim PP (ez a monog­ram­ja), aki­vel a minap (hét­vé­gén, tegyük hoz­zá!) kel­le­mes beszél­ge­té­sem volt. Azóta már nem BFF-em (ki érti, miért?), de azért ide­ra­kom a chat­lo­got, mert vicces.

PP: Hel­lo Lasz­lo, Let me know if you’­re loo­king for Web and Mobi­le App devel­oper & Design­er assis­tance. We pro­vi­de qua­lity to our deity cus­to­mers at $15/hr. Qua­lity: www.XXX.com/all-portfolios.php Skills: www.dribbble.com/XXX Look for­ward to your response.

LM: Hi P, I’d like to offer you our engi­ne­e­ring and con­sult­ing ser­vi­ces. We are a bit more expen­sive than 15 bucks an hour, but at lea­st we are not limi­ted to mobi­le deve­lop­ment. Sho­uld I send you a cont­ract? Che­ers, Laszlo

PP: Are you loo­king for any web or mobi­le app deve­lop­ment ser­vi­ces for now? We char­ge only 15 per hour

LM: Are you loo­king for good devel­opers for now? I can char­ge you XXX CHF a day. (Ide beír­tam egy szép nagy szá­mot, ami­nek sem­mi köze a való­ság­hoz.) Ple­a­se tell me how much time you need to think to find out that you are trying to sell your deve­lop­ment capa­bi­li­ti­es to a com­pany who do that and much more. I give you 1 minute.

PP: I under­stand. Just visit our web­site once: It’s www.XXX.com

LM: Who is your boss? I’ll tell her that you keep annoying me

PP: I’m the boss only. The tha­la­i­va of the company

LM: Are you also writing to X and Y? (Ide berak­tam két kon­ku­rens cég nevét, de nem fogom itt rek­lá­moz­ni őket.) Are they loo­king for devel­opers, or may­be they can sort it out with the­ir 300’000 emp­loye­es? (…) I was think­ing, I would like to buy a mobi­le app from you guys. It sho­uld be con­nec­ted to the mes­sag­ing API of Lin­ke­dIn. The use case is simp­le: if I’m wor­king for a deve­lop­ment com­pany and som­eo­ne app­ro­a­ches me asking if I need ser­vi­ces from a deve­lop­ment com­pany, then it sends smart and sati­ri­cal mes­sa­ges to that per­son trying to find out how quickly she will apo­lo­gi­ze and stop dis­tur­bing me. How much would this cost?

PP: It’s depends on scope of the docu­ment. Ple­a­se sha­re with me so that I can give you exact estimation

LM: I have a simp­ler use case. I give you 15 USD right now, and you don’t write to me anyth­ing for at lea­st a year. No quest­ions asked. No links. No offe­ring of ser­vi­ces. Do we have a deal? Tick-tock. Okay, now it went down to 8 USD. And now the offer expired

PP: Do you have 15USD ?

LM: I can get a mortgage

PP: That would be awesome

LM: Send me your IBAN

PP: For what ? Do you wan­na send $15 ?

LM: Yes. But to be able to do so I’d ask you to send me a one-time pay­ment of 16 USD. To know that you are not a bot. But a seri­o­us busi­ness­man. Tha­la­i­va, as we say it in Hun­ga­ri­an. It trans­la­tes to “a per­son who doesn’t know when to stop mes­sag­ing on LinkedIn”

PP: lol

LM: P, I’ll be hon­est with you, I’m not a good client

PP: I understand

LM: You are a nice per­son and I wish you good luck in your busi­ness and per­so­nal life. Take care. Stay safe

PP: You really dont know how to talk with per­son. Kar­ma will see you soon. Thanks

LM: 👍

PP: 😊